Today’s post is another one inspired by my read through Ken Honda’s Happy Money book; he wrote something that made me think, and I wanted to talk about it with you guys!
In one chapter, he made sort of a passing reference to a container as a metaphor for our monetary or material desires in life.
If we have a very large container, we can put a lot of money in, but our container feels rather empty, like we don’t have enough.
But if we have a smaller container, it is a lot easier to fill.
Put another way….
If your container is the size of $10,000/month, your $5000 paycheck will leave it only half full.
But if your container is a $5000/month size, your $5000 paycheck will fill the container to the brim.
Attainable dreams: my dream car and my dream house
I have told you guys many times before about my dream car, which is a Honda Civic with a sunroof.
I haven’t bought mine yet. This is one of my kids’ Civics from several years ago.
Sometimes people have chuckled at the fact that this is my dream car, saying, “Maybe you should aim higher!”
But I know that when I finally do get my little Civic, my heart will be happy. My “car desire container” is actually, factually Civic-sized, so my Civic purchase will fill that container perfectly. ; )
A bonus: this dream car is attainable!
I told you all recently about my dream house, which is honestly also rather attainable, except for maybe the part about being on top of a hill.
If I get a little house with a porch and an en suite bathroom and some wood floors…that will legitimately fill my “house desire container”.
Can you change the size of your container?
This is the part I really want to discuss with you all: Can we change the sizes of our metaphorical containers? Or are they predetermined?
I’m not sure I did anything in particular to make the very attainable Civic my dream car.
I’m also not sure I did anything special to form my house desires into something pretty simple.
So, what is it that shapes our containers, which are really just our expectations? I don’t know!
I suppose that, like many things in life, it is a combination of nature and nurture. The nature part is pretty fixed, and when we are kids, we have little control over the nurture and the influences around us.
However, as adults, we do have some choices over what we surround ourselves with. If we are around people who normalize having very big “containers” for almost everything, then that will seem normal to us.
Imagine having a container of this size!
But if we are around people who have smaller containers, that can help normalize a more attainable, realistic type of expectation.
This is the value I see in people who operate as de-influencers; instead of influencing you to upsize your container, they work to normalize a downsized container.
Here’s a normal house that I am happy in!
Here’s a normal body that I am happy in!
Here’s a secondhand coat I happily wear!
Here’s a free activity I happily do!
Here’s a water bottle I got from the Goodwill bins! (Oh wait, that’s me.)
My Goodwill bins water bottle, thoroughly sanitized
And when we see this kind of thing, I do think it can help to make our metaphorical containers a little smaller and a little more fillable.
